In theory, this movie should be awesome. Right? Giant robots. Explosions. Gun battles. Did I mention the giant robots? You’d think Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen would be a smash hit. It’s been out just a few days, and had already broken $120 million by close of Friday. That makes it successful, doesn’t it?
It depends on who you ask. And if you ask me, the movie was terrible. I’ve learned a valuable lesson today, at the hands of Michael Bay: It takes more than giant robots and explosions to make a good movie.
It also takes a plot. While Transformers 2 had a plot, it’s a terrible one. It makes no sense, and isn’t explained nearly enough to have any substance to it. For those who haven’t seen it yet, I’ll summarize: Decepticons (the bad guys) came to Earth hundreds of years ago and made a big machine that can kill our sun, to give them energy. The Autobots (the good guys) have to try to stop them.
Really? They get power from killing suns of planets? Imaginative, but completely stupid.
What else does a movie need to be good? How about some good acting? Also missing from Transformers 2. While I certainly won’t argue with anyone about how hot Megan Fox is, if I never hear her speak or see her try to act again in my life, it’ll be too soon. And Shia LaBeouf may have been a big rising star back when he did Holes, but let’s face it, he really outgrew his window of adorability. He’s striking out lately in the acting department. Please don’t get me started on the last Indiana Jones film he was in.
While the film did have some high moments, and some interesting scenes, overall it was boring. Filled with geographic inconsistencies and plot holes. (Seriously, behind the Air and Space Museum in D.C. is a field full of retired aircraft? No, there’s just another museum back there.)
To judge whether or not you’d like the movie, let’s think back to the second Pirates of the Caribbean film. What was your first thought when you left the theater? “Wow, that was bad. It felt like a really long commercial for the third film.” That’s exactly that Transformers 2 is, a commercial for the next film. It ends on one of those “there’s gonna be another one!!” moments, and it just feels dirty, and cheap.
If you want to watch a movie with awesome CGI, and a good story line, see Star Trek, you’ll thank me. Skip Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Wait for it to hit Netflix, and then get it. You’ll still be mad you wasted two and a half hours of your life, but at least it’ll have saved you $10 on the price of admission. Be sure to read the “spoiler” below, to find out my biggest pet peeve of the film.
This movie is called Revenge of the Fallen. I don’t know about you, but where I come from, “revenge” means I get even with someone. Not I kill Optimus Prime, brag about it, he comes back to live and kicks the ever-lovin’ crap outta me. That’s not revege.
The movie should have been called Transformers: The Good Guys Win, Again. And Some Other Plot Lines You Don’t Give A Crap About. That would have at least been more accurate, and less misleading.
A few things have broken since I called it a day earlier. Here’s the scoop.
1) Variety has reported that Leonardo DiCaprio will star in Christopher Nolan’s next flick, Inception, which is going to be a Sci-fi thriller.
2) Megan Fox has been cast in not one, but two movies today: the first being Fathom, and then a few hours later she was cast in Jonah Hex.
3) Danelle Panabaker (most recently from the new Friday the 13th) has been cast in The Crazies, with Timothy Olyphant and Radha Mitchell. The Crazies is based on George Romero’s pre Dawn of the Dead virus movie.
Little Miss Tranformers is moving her way up in the world. But enough about boobs, Christopher Nolan’s making another movie. Part of me wants to go watch Memento, and the other part can’t stop thinking “you wanna know how I got these scars?”
Initially there was a scene in the movie in which she walks topless out of a lake (pictures had surfaced of the scene being filmed, and have since been removed at the request of 20th Century Fox). According to some people who have seen an early screening, the scene is no longer in the movie. What’s worse is that they’re saying the movie is awful anyway.
I wasn’t too psyched about watching Megan Fox try to act (running in tight jeans in Transformers, which may be a talent, is not acting), I was excited to see writer Diablo Cody’s follow-up to Juno.
Jennifer’s Body will be in theaters sometime in 2009, boobies or no boobies.
The internet is abuzz with the news that Transformers star Megan Fox will be topless in her next movie, titled Jennifer’s Body. Director Jason Reitman revealed the “news” on the Howard Stern show.
Seriously folks…this is news? They’re boobs. We’ve seen them before.
We saw them in Forgetting Sarah Marshall (from Mila Kunis). We saw them in Swordfish (from Halle Berry). And approximately half the country can look down and see them right now. No offense to Miss Fox (if that’s even her real name), but they can’t be that impressive.