Like any other Transformers movie, you can’t go into this thinking it’s going to be the best movie you’ve ever seen. If you do, you’ll be disappointed.
Transformers: Dark of the Moon is like the last two Transformers movies – sans Megan Fox. A bunch of giant robots, a bunch of action, some mediocre acting, and transforming. What this third installment has less of is annoying stuff – Megan Fox and Sam’s annoying and whiney parents are two prime examples.
At over two and a half hours long, this film could definitely have been cut down by at least 45 minutes to an hour. There were times when I literally thought “C’mon, it has to end soon, right?” and it just kept going and going and going. My buddy that I saw it with said that the last battle scene felt “infinite”. I didn’t time it, but the climactic scene was easily over half an hour.
In typical Michael Bay fashion there are lots of camera cuts. But not so much that it’s distracting from the film. You’re pretty focused on the giant robots that are doing cool things on screen. Said robots look even more realistic in 3D. Industrial Light & Magic does an amazing job in making these things look real, almost too real.
Speaking of 3D, this film uses it quite nicely. I’ve seen 3D movies before, but never ones that were quite like this. Instead of using 3D as a gimmick to make more cash from movie goers, Transformers: Dark of the Moon actually uses it to enhance fight scenes. When I think of 3D, I think of movies that were specifically built for it – throwing things at the camera, flying through tunnels, etc. This film has quite a few moments where the 3D is used quite well. In addition to providing depth to what’s on the screen, there are many times when there’s that “it’s gonna hit me!” moment, which is cool. The extra few bucks for the 3D version was really worth it, and I’ll likely grab the 3D blu-ray disc when it becomes available.
There was a story somewhere in the film too, but I wasn’t really all that invested in it. I said it back when the first in the trilogy came out, and I stick by it – I don’t care what the story’s about, as long as robots are mashing each other’s faces in. Whether or not the story was any good is debateable. I just left the theater not long ago, and I’m having a hard time remembering all the fine details of what the story was. That’s how important it was to my enjoying the movie.
Don’t get me wrong, I did enjoy the movie. Despite its complete cheesiness factor, somewhat non-existent acting, and some of the more absurd robots. (A robot named Q that makes gadgets for them, really? I’m pretty sure the James Bond franchise will be filing a lawsuit shortly.) And while I maintain that this third installment is far too long, I still had a good time. Watching 3D robots destroy each other, and a lot of their surroundings is pretty epic.
If you liked the first two movies even a little bit, you’ll most likely enjoy the third movie as well. While not the greatest movie ever made, it’s a good 2.5 hours of mindless fun where you can just turn off your brain, enjoy the CGI, and drink your 5000 ounce soda.
In theory, this movie should be awesome. Right? Giant robots. Explosions. Gun battles. Did I mention the giant robots? You’d think Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen would be a smash hit. It’s been out just a few days, and had already broken $120 million by close of Friday. That makes it successful, doesn’t it?
It depends on who you ask. And if you ask me, the movie was terrible. I’ve learned a valuable lesson today, at the hands of Michael Bay: It takes more than giant robots and explosions to make a good movie.
It also takes a plot. While Transformers 2 had a plot, it’s a terrible one. It makes no sense, and isn’t explained nearly enough to have any substance to it. For those who haven’t seen it yet, I’ll summarize: Decepticons (the bad guys) came to Earth hundreds of years ago and made a big machine that can kill our sun, to give them energy. The Autobots (the good guys) have to try to stop them.
Really? They get power from killing suns of planets? Imaginative, but completely stupid.
What else does a movie need to be good? How about some good acting? Also missing from Transformers 2. While I certainly won’t argue with anyone about how hot Megan Fox is, if I never hear her speak or see her try to act again in my life, it’ll be too soon. And Shia LaBeouf may have been a big rising star back when he did Holes, but let’s face it, he really outgrew his window of adorability. He’s striking out lately in the acting department. Please don’t get me started on the last Indiana Jones film he was in.
While the film did have some high moments, and some interesting scenes, overall it was boring. Filled with geographic inconsistencies and plot holes. (Seriously, behind the Air and Space Museum in D.C. is a field full of retired aircraft? No, there’s just another museum back there.)
To judge whether or not you’d like the movie, let’s think back to the second Pirates of the Caribbean film. What was your first thought when you left the theater? “Wow, that was bad. It felt like a really long commercial for the third film.” That’s exactly that Transformers 2 is, a commercial for the next film. It ends on one of those “there’s gonna be another one!!” moments, and it just feels dirty, and cheap.
If you want to watch a movie with awesome CGI, and a good story line, see Star Trek, you’ll thank me. Skip Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Wait for it to hit Netflix, and then get it. You’ll still be mad you wasted two and a half hours of your life, but at least it’ll have saved you $10 on the price of admission. Be sure to read the “spoiler” below, to find out my biggest pet peeve of the film.
This movie is called Revenge of the Fallen. I don’t know about you, but where I come from, “revenge” means I get even with someone. Not I kill Optimus Prime, brag about it, he comes back to live and kicks the ever-lovin’ crap outta me. That’s not revege.
The movie should have been called Transformers: The Good Guys Win, Again. And Some Other Plot Lines You Don’t Give A Crap About. That would have at least been more accurate, and less misleading.
The Transformers 2 casting rumor that Jonah Hill was going to play Shia LaBeouf’s sidekick actually turned out to be semi-true. For a while, Hill was in talks to play the role. Unfortunately, EW.com reports that the talks have broken down.
I’m bummed for a couple of reasons. One, I’m a little tired of Shia LaBeouf and I thought Jonah Hill would be a nice scene stealer. And two, it would give Hill a chance to practice his PG-13 humor.
Back in November, the Transformers star was arrested for refusing to leave a Walgreens, of all places.
Last week, a bench warrant was filed for him when he didn’t show up for a court hearing about smoking in a non-smoking area.
Today IMDb is reporting that Shia LaBeouf’s car has been impounded for improper parking.
It’s almost as if he’s trying to join the ranks of Lohan and Hilton, but is just too much of a good boy to do it. Don’t get me wrong – I’m glad Shia hasn’t landed himself in rehab or been slapped with a paternity suit, or worse, but I think it’s almost (almost) funny how he’s gathering all these little problems behind him.
Anyone want to guess what’s next? Keying cars? Toilet-papering Steven Spielberg’s house?