Hello, people! Up here in New England, another snowstorm hit Monday! Just what we needed! Well, at least most of you chose to go to the cinema the weekend before it all started! Are you ready to get all those nifty results to my predictions? You’ve come to the right place! This weekend’s DIB? is revved up and ready to go!
First Sunday: A desperate Ice Cube and Tracy Morgan need some dough quick, so not only do they decide to commit robbery, but to add more to that horrendous idea is the choice of locale for the crime: church. I’m rolling my eyes just pondering it. Will It Bomb? I think it’ll be either dead last on the last, or at the worst, a complete bomb. Did It Bomb? All right. I should have guessed this would happen. Much to my dismay, this pulled in $19 million and made it to #2. Outcome: Strike! 0 out of 4.
In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale: Jason Statham, what have you done? You went and got yourself into quite a mess by picking a really horrific script! The badass tried to be a medieval badass to help the kingdom, but it wasn’t looking like anyone was biting. Will It Bomb? It’s going to bomb like there’s no tomorrow! If any of it is salvageable, it will be at the low, low end of the 10. Did It Bomb? Absolutely and undoubtedly a total bomb! I knew it! It only made $3.3 million! Outcome: Score! 1 out of 4.
The Orphanage: Guillermo Del Toro introduces Juan Antonio Bayona’s story of a woman living in a freaky looking house where there may be something of a supernatural nature taking place. Will It Bomb? Del Toro’s got plenty of respect from the industry, so that will shine a needed light on this newcomer. While this will make a good amount of money, I don’t think there was enough publicity and such to get in on the Top 10 so soon. Did It Bomb? $2 million made over the weekend in its Limited Release! That’s great! This will be one to keep an eye on! Outcome: Score! 2 out of 4.
The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything: A VeggieTales Movie: The vegetables from this popular children’s series get Sparrowed in this newest installment. Will It Bomb? The fans and the kids will bring in some cash for this flick. It will do fairly well, and will probably make it into the center of the 10. Did It Bomb? Well, it didn’t go up the ladder like I thought it would, but it made a decent amount of $4.42 million and landed in the #9 position. Outcome: Mezza-mezza. 2 ½ out of 4.
I have an exciting update! A couple of weeks ago, I talked a bit about a little flick called The Bucket List. Talk about a success! This past weekend it skyrocketed to the # 1 spot, taking in a total of $21 million dollars!
***Official Box Office tallies and positions according to Variety (variety.com), The Hollywood Reporter (hollywoodreporter.com) and the Internet Movie Database (imdb.com).
All righty, kids! I’ve reached the end for this past weekend! WIB? will be coming at you in a couple of days will all the newbies. Stay tuned for next week’s edition of DIB? for all the results! I will see you all then!
Good evening, guys! What would the weekend be without the latest film releases coming to you and a little blurb from yours truly as to how they are going to stack up?!
That’s right! It’s time for another sparkling installment of WIB?! We have a bunch of new flicks to discuss, so let’s roll!
First Sunday: Ice Cube and Tracy Morgan are a little hard up for cash, so what is a responsible person in need of funds to do? Well, the two aren’t really savvy to that notion, so they decide to rob a church, of all places. While I think the entire premise of this film is foolish, I did laugh at one little part of the trailer. Basically, these two are fairly decent comedic actors who are wasting their talents on this fluff. Sad… Will It Bomb? It’s a movie that goes way beyond normal levels of stupidity, but it’ll bring in a tiny bit of money. Absolute bottom of the 10, if not a total bomb.
In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale: All of us here at MovieSnobs have a deep respect for and fascination with the body of work that is Jason Statham. Somehow our beloved British badass is now in a film that isn’t really floating my boat. As a medieval warrior battling for his king, Statham doesn’t have much support, casting-wise and with the script. While the trailer shows him sword-fighting and doing what he does best, that will not be enough for most of his fans. Will It Bomb? I hate to say this, but it’s not looking good. Personally, I am quite disappointed! Low end of the 10, financially, but I smell a bomb.
The Orphanage: Guillermo Del Toro dazzled us with his visually stunning Pan’s Labyrinth last year, and now he follows Quentin Tarantino’s example by presenting a new filmmaker to the masses. Directed by Juan Antonio Bayona, the trailer doesn’t give too much insight into the whole plot line. From what I can gather, there’s a woman holed up in some dark scary house, and she has a reason to be very, very afraid. Will It Bomb? Well-respected directors have much clout, which is good for the new breed they take under their wing. It means more publicity, more curiosity, and more revenue! I think this will have a decent turnout, but I doubt that it will get a spot in the 10 for its opening weekend.
The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything: A VeggieTales Movie: Yes, cute little vegetables star in this homage to the Pirates movies, where they help out a princess to rescue her missing brother. While I’m not really up to speed on the popularity of VeggieTales, this is one that the kids will like. Will It Bomb? I vote that the young ones and fans of the Veggies will make up the revenue. This will have a decent take, and it could possibly set up shop in the middle of the Top 10. My guess is when it goes to DVD, more people will see it.
There you have it for this week, kids! I’ll have the official results next week over at DIB?, as always! WIB? returns next week with a whole new crop of movies to get you all riled up! I hope you all have a great weekend, and Happy Moviegoing!